Greatness is in Everyone

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Marianne Williamson

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Communication is Vital – 5 Great Examples

Greatness is a Choice

Communication

Is it possible to have great relationships? I think so if we make choices that are in agreements with our vision for our life. Yesterday, as I was reviewing one of my favorite sites it dawned on me why do so many people in relationships ignore extremely obvious signs of “Disaster”? Is it not common knowledge that communication is 80% non-verbal? Likewise, non-verbal communication is not sign language or letter writing because those forms would still require the use of words. Non-verbal communication is body language…which happends to be the things that your body does without any conscious thought that always tell the real story.

For example, if someone simply asks me “How are you Sharon” and I reply wonderful yet sound very dry, my eyes are looking down and worst of all, my voice tone reminds everyone of droopy the dog. Who in the world will I convince…

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Communication is Vital – 5 Great Examples

Communication

Is it possible to have great relationships? I think so if we make choices that are in agreements with our vision for our life. Yesterday, as I was reviewing one of my favorite sites it dawned on me why do so many people in relationships ignore extremely obvious signs of “Disaster”? Is it not common knowledge that communication is 80% non-verbal? Likewise, non-verbal communication is not sign language or letter writing because those forms would still require the use of words. Non-verbal communication is body language…which happends to be the things that your body does without any conscious thought that always tell the real story.

For example, if someone simply asks me “How are you Sharon” and I reply wonderful yet sound very dry, my eyes are looking down and worst of all, my voice tone reminds everyone of droopy the dog. Who in the world will I convince that I’m truly happy? In my, opinion, I personally believe that I would not convince any person with common sense because thankfully my body language has spoken all the volumes necessary to the average person with any common sense! As a result, words are powerful but need to be expressed in a uniform manner with our body language. Therefore, in relationships, it is so perplexing to me why so many men and women waste so much valuable time on truly several DEAD SITUATIONS!

To begin with, what is a DEAD SITUATION? The following are 5 great examples:
1. If a guy or girl never calls or initiate any form of contact, they are simply not interested. End of story please stop wasting your precious time on the why and move on! Time is so valuable and can never be replaced once it is spent. As a result, everyone should be so selective about who, what, when, where, why and how their time will ever be spent. Life will never offer a return on our time so remember to always spend time well.
2. If a guy or girl wants to be married, they will ask and nothing will hold them back or stop them if they are truly interested. However, if it takes a man or woman 65 years and I’m being funny, they simply just either do not want to marry you, are waiting on the bigger and better opportunity or Marriage is not a priority or on the to do list in their book. Final answer, actions speak louder than words, no exceptions and stop fighting the obvious!
3. Desperate is NEVER ATTRACTIVE and is a turn off, enough said already!
4. Confidence is VERY ATTRACTIVE! Attractiveness is truly a state of mind and is expressed from the inside out! True confidence can be identified a mile away always! Likewise, true beauty is beautiful on the inside and out and that is the end of that story!
5. Communication in a relationship is vital to any relationship true success. When a person cares for or loves you, they will always make it their business to show if they are truly vested in the relationship. Grown-ups always ensures that home is intact, safe and secured because no one wants to lose their best friend, missing rib or soul mate if they can help it. Trust and believe that will definitely cause true pain and sorrow. However, if a person can let you go easily, you were never, ever on their keepers list and trust everyone has a list and knows who is and isn’t on it.
Finally, remember always to keep God first and commit to being an asset oppose to a liability in a relationship. Remember, that if you put God first and focus on being the very best you, God always does answer prayer if your willing to put faith and works together.

The Front Row: Staring You

Front RowFront Row Seat – Life is the ultimate theater so invite your audiences carefully. Not everyone is holy enough and healthy enough to have a FRONT ROW seat in our lives. There are some people in your life who need to be loved
from a distance. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you let go,
or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible,
not-going-anywhere relationships, friendships, fellowships and family!

Not everyone can be in Your FRONT ROW.

Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention to: Which
ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage, and which ones
discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which
ones are just going downhill? When you leave certain people, do you feel
better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don’t really
understand, know and appreciate you and the gift that lies within you?

Not everyone can be in Your FRONT ROW.

The more you seek God and the things of God, the more you seek
quality; the more you seek not just the hand of God but the face of God,
the more you seek things honorable; the more you seek growth, peace of
mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to
decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the
balcony of your life.

Everyone Can’t be in Your FRONT ROW.

You cannot change the people around you… but you can change the
people you are around! Ask God for wisdom and discernment and choose
wisely the people who sit in the FRONT ROW of your life. Remember
that FRONT ROW seats are for special and deserving people and those
who sit in your FRONT ROW should be chosen carefully.

Everyone Can’t be in Your FRONT ROW.

(I received this gift from Jennifer Lee 20 years ago, thanks 🙂

Hope all enjoy)

Author unknown

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Life ABC’s

Hello family and friends,

I just saw a great note online and wanted to share:

4th of July in Chicago

The Present is a Gift, that is why we must always look at our glass life handed you and be GRATEFUL!!!  Someone at any given point will always admire and would like to switch if they could.  Life is simply about learning how to dance in the rain and remain positive while the storm is coming down.  The good thing about rain storm is that we all know eventually, they all come to an end!!!  I’m simply so thankful and absolutely loving life and appreciating all of God’s grace, mercy and blessing!!! 

God is always on time and the Lord is always there!  So thankful that we loved us first and he is soooo forgiving!!!

 Accept differences; Be kind; Count your blessings; Dream; Express thanks; Forgive; Give freely; Harm no one; Imagine more; Jettison anger; Keep confidences; Love truly; Master something; Nurture hope; Open your mind; Pack lightly; Quell rumors; Reciprocate; Seek wisdom; Touch hearts; Understand; Value truth; Win graciously; Xeriscape; Yearn for peace; Zealously support a worthy cause.

Happy 4th of July Weekend!!!

 

Wonderful Black Fathers

Wonderful Fathers of Color

Good Morning family and friends,

I orginally posted this message last year and thought it would be appropriate to repost this year in Honor of Father’s Day. There are still plenty of our men that have the formula down right!

I went to a wonderful training titled “Providing African-American Fathers Services to Build Father-Child Relationships: Everyday is Father’s Day”. In our society today, a lot of African-American fathers get a bad rap. It appears since the Cosby show left our television that positive Images of Black fathers are few and far between. The constant images on the news of gang violence, drug activity, deadbeat dads, deteriorating communities, uneducated Black boys/young men, over populated jails, disrespectful rappers, unfaithful athletes, Black on Black violence and reports of Black men on the endangered specious status, leave many people to believe that the fate of Black men is bleak at best. Therefore, when President Obama was running for office, words can barely express the feelings of excitement and pure joy that I felt. As a fellow Chicagoan like President Obama, he personally made me feel it was ok to reclaim my wonderful city Chicago! President Obama and his vision was just what I needed and what the doctor order. Mr. Obama was God-fearing, educated, smart, committed, loyal, a man of integrity, attractive, a good husband, a great father, a mentor, a community advocate and simply put a wonderful role model. Finally, an image of an African-American man who is accurate and positive. Thankfully, President Obama is not the only great Black man in Chicago/United States. Personally, I know several wonderful Black men who are great fathers starting with my daddy. My dad has been in my life since day one and as a child I could and currently can always count on Roosevelt rain or shine! My father was an excellent role model, provider and simply everything imaginable of what a father should be and do. My father made being a great dad seem so easy which in hindsight was an amazing task considering like President Obama, his dad was inactive in his life. So I decided today I would list 8 amazing African-American fathers that I know personally and encourage others around me to acknowledge the ones they know too! The media is accurate regarding some but trust there is another story that is positive to tell. The media do not have the whole real story!

My Personal List of Great African-American Fathers:

  1. Roosevelt, my father is everything a great father should be (God-fearing, great listener, great provider, an advocate, a man of integrity, committed, fun to be with and smart).
  2. Joseph, my husband is the most intelligent man on this earth. Joe has a brilliant mind, is a great father and husband. I love and appreciate his desire and determination to take care of our family. A man willing to sacrifice sleep and work so hard to ensure his family needs and wants are met. Plus, I have to mention Joe is an excellent cook and he cooks everyday for our family. In addition, words can not describe the absolute joy I feel when my husband holds our daughter. That man absolutely adores and loves his daughter and all of our children. A real Black man definitely takes cares of business. Although we certainly had struggles, I’m so thankful God sent me my husband on Morgan Park’s high school track one Sunday morning! I completely trust him and his vision for my family. I know this for sure because every time I follow him and go up and fly,I know 2 things for sure like Oprah, that God is real and that I trust my husband with my life.
  3. Charles Glass, my cousin is such a hard worker and so INVOLVED in his children lives and activities. Coaching and being a wonderful father to his biological children and the ones he selected to adopt in his heart as his very own. Charles, remember every seed that we plant and nurture grows and flourish. No good deed is every lost and know that all of your hard work and sacrifice will pay off in the end. Charles you are also an amazing cook and make almost anything taste delicious.
  4. Charles Frelix, my uncle is a great professor and simply a man who definitely took excellent care of his family and responsibilities.
  5. Lee Pittman, my uncle name has got to be in the dictionary next to the word faithful. When my aunt had MS, was blind, could not walk and was terminal. My uncle was faithful and committed to his wife until she passed away and never complained. My uncle was her only care-taker and would take her to every event in a wheelchair and would be so excited and want to witness and tell you how good God was. It was simply amazing to witness his love and commitment to his deceased wife. Whenever, I see him I smile because I know for sure he is a wonderful man.
  6. Earl Rowe, my father-in-law is just simply awesome. My father-in-law is in his 70′s and is highly educated with multiple master degrees and world traveled. I truly love talking to him and hearing his wonderful stories of childhood, being a principal, his views on parenting and making a difference in the world. His stories of how students have come back to him and told how he changed their life is so touching to hear!
  7. Edward Watkins, my cousin Edward is a wonderful father and testament of what a Black Father is. My cousin raised 5 children alone when his wife decided she needed to be free. Edward raised children and cooked, cleaned and did hair. Edward loves God, is super intelligent and his memory almost has mine beat. When I wanted to start a mentoring program to assist at-risk youth Edward was right there and so supportive. Edward wasn’t only one of Chicago Finest Sergeants, or the most awesome Veteran to serve and protect but he is a great example of what a hard-working fathers can do and achieve. I admired how Edward set his standards high, welcomes a challenge and always have a desire to help and do more!
  8. Pastor John Veal, my brother-law is a great visionary and absolutely loves and adores his family. It is so wonderful to know people like John who walks the walks and talk the talk. Not only is John a great servant for God, but he is a great husband, father, son, pastor, advocate, mentor and high school teacher at Fenger High School in Chicago.

In closing, I still could go on and on about the Wonderful Black Fathers I know personally such as Fatin Dantzler (aka from Kindred The Family Soul), Edward Travis, Art Sims, DCFS’s Douglas Washington, Comedian Jay Deep, Comedian Robert/ Stick, Robert Lee, Spoken word artist Odyssey, Devon Dickerson, Robert Thompson, DCFS’s Director Erwin McEwen, James Brooks, Marty Thomas, Reginald Crump, Keith Ward, Gregory Fields, Nathiel Ward, Earl Roberson, Alfred Thompkins, Troy Holt, Kinsley James, Bryan Johnson, Michael Hardrick, Ello Miller, Kenya Hayes, Marc Woods, Dwayne Dunnigan, Duncan Ward, Loren Hunley, Paul White, Eric Carter, Lord Byron Taylor, Erik Carthans, Dyrrah Christian, Officer John Woods, Eric Knox, Steve Rowe, Joseph Durr, Officer Hart, Mark Harris, Josiah Fuller, Darnell Williams, Daniel Barbour, Jay Thomas, Chaun Lewis, Maurice Coffey, Eric Beck, Jerry Walton, Pastor Frank Brim, Hershal Walton, Earl McDouglas, Bennie Parrot, Officer Chris Logan and Dr. Holloway to name a few and I still have many more I can think of. I just stopped at the Black Fathers, just imaged if I included the outstanding black men who just so happened to have not fathered a child biologically.

P.S. I have to mention that several of these men graduated from my beloved Lindblom Technical High School in the Englewood area of Chicago! LTHS/ Eagle men surely know how to be great dads, leaders and community advocates! They definitely pride themselves in being great agents of positive change and responsible MEN!

Dark Skin

Good Morning, Wow I saw a movie preview for a documentary name “Dark Child”, very powerful & made me cry this morning! This was my life story! When I had my children, the very sad truth was I was so excited because they all were very light or looked mixed!!! I would never seriously date a dark man because it was no way I was going to have a dark child! So very sad!!! Did not want my children to know my pain!!! Bradinn French is TELLING MY STORY!!!!! I had very low self-esteem because I hated my color. I was called blackie, burnt black skilet, Olive Oil, cute to be dark, pretty hair & nail for a dark girl & so many hurtful thing. I was so shy because the people who let me know my color was unacceptable was first my family. My cousins & brother used to roast me every single weekend. Oh how I hated to go outside & play with children because most of my cousins were mixed or light skinned & I wanted no parts of additional teasing. I was selected to run for Ms. Illinois USA in 1993 & I was excited because I felt official. That I was finally worthy to be appreciated. When I was in high school, I always had boyfriends but I was extremely shy!  Ironically, they only type of boys I was attracted too & still to this day was a super high yellow man or white!  It was no way in the world I was going to take a chance on bringing a dark child to be teased & suffer like I did. What’s so sad, almost every man I have dated despite my father being dark & I love so dearly were extremely light skinned or white. My children are all yellow & I was praising God for that. Very sad isn’t it. I model now and I’m married to a very light skinned man. Getting a man has never been a problem but my self-esteem would always make me wonder why light skinned guys or any guy for that matter was attracted to me. I knew I had a beautiful body but always struggle when my husband or any man for that matter says hello beautiful. I still hear burnt black skillet in the back-ground. So thanks again for telling my story!  Only wished I could have participated in this movie!!!

Affirming Children

I saw online something great that needed to be shared. Our children need to be affirmed in order for them to be and do great things. Everybody needs and deserves to feel loved and appreciated. Love truly makes the world go round!

25 Ways to Praise a Child or Your Children

(1) You’re spectacular
(2) You are responsible
(3) You make me happy
(4) I respect you
(5) You made my day
(6) A big hug
(7) A big kiss
(8) Super work
(9) I’m proud of you
(10) Super
(11) You’re beautiful
(12) You mean the world to me
(13) How nice
(14) Now you’ve got it
(15) Remarkable job
(16) Great discovery
(17) Marvelous
(18) Looking good
(19) You’re a star
(20) Well done
(21) Good
(22) Wow
(23) You’ve discovered the secret
(24) I trust you
(25) Say I Love You

Giving Thanks

Everyday should be a day to give thanks just like on thanksgiving.  I just want to Thank the Lord for Loving Us All. Thank him for when I was in the doctor office a few weeks ago in May, the doctor came in & said Mrs. Rowe the lump is beign and surgery won’t be necessary to God be the glory!!! God is still answering prayer and is always on time! Lord thank you for giving me the Best Daddy in the World, for I know for sure if he is a reflection of you Heaven, Heaven must be an Awesome Place! My Daddy is the Best and if I have to say so myself my daddy is one of the best dressers in the world!!!